It’s just not that warm anymore. The wind today is blowing strong, and it has a bite. There is a fringe of snow on the mountain tops and the trees, so recently a panoply of Autumn splendor, now sit forlorn and exposed, devoid of colour and expression. One can almost be forgiven if they are feeling a little bit down; it’s hard not to be sad when all you seemingly have to look forward to is darkness, frostbite, snow drifts and sickness. Yeah, well, who cares? Not me. That shit is in the future and right now the present is where we are and it’s awesome! Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, it’s ROCKTOBER, the greatest of all months. Okay, I know what you are thinking – the dude has lost his fricking mind – but hear me out. This really is the best month of the year.
First off, why do I call it Rocktober? Well, I celebrate a birthday during this month and while I keep things on the rails now, there was a time when some crazy shit went down. It wasn’t all bad either; there are a lot of very nice memories associated with the tenth month in our Gregorian calendar with many of these recollections involving high octane, ear-piercing metal, hence the changing of the name from October to Rocktober. Plus, Rocktober just sounds way cooler.
I feel more energized in Rocktober and although I can find no data to back up my assertion, it has always been my belief that your birth month is always your best month. Roctober is when I go back to the gym. Well, in most years this is the month I go back to the gym. This year I haven’t quite made it there yet. Hey, like I am super busy you know? The way I see it, if I can get in a workout before the calendar turns to November, then we good! It might happen, I think. The little voice inside my head, you know the one, keeps telling me to get at it, especially when I am trying to enjoy a nice bit of ice cream (read: huge bowl) while watching a game. Then there are those annoying Peloton commercials – hey Peloton, like seriously – FUCK YOU!!! You are making me feel guilty here, I am trying to watch the Dodgers, man!
I also associate this month with bird dogs and pheasant hunting with my father. In this instance, it was definitely NOT Roctober as Jimmy had a tendency to hit the eject button and toss the offending cassette out the window – It was rather apparent that the man was not an afficionado of Van Halen. All the same, riding around while listening to the baseball playoffs on the radio, talking life in general as we sipped coffee from a thermos, those are experiences I will never have again. Often, as the sun is going down at this time of year, my mind drifts back to those days, walking across a field with him and the dog; we were cold, hungry and happy. These are special memories to be held forever close to the heart.
Then there is Halloween; I will NEVER, I repeat NEVER, be caught wearing a stupid costume on or around Halloween (I am not Grumpymarty for no reason) but there’s that candy thing. Grumpymarty likes candy, like I REALLY like candy, which is very apparent by my ever-expanding gut. I am guessing however that this is where the gym thing comes in eh? Oh yeah right, hey Peloton – fuck you!!! Just because!
Finally, there is the baseball. I love baseball. Baseball however, has not always loved me back. That’s because baseball is cruel. My very first baseball practice ended before it even began because I decided to wander out onto the middle of the infield unannounced. It wasn’t the best decision I could have made. One baseball off my little “pin” head later and I was back in the car and going home. I should have heeded this warning from the Gods but no, I kept coming back, to ball parks all over North America in some cases, to get my fix from this beautiful yet heart-breaking sport. And right now, baseball takes center stage, the October playoffs culminating in the World Series (which the Dodgers won last year by the way).
So now friends, I must sign off. There is hair metal to headbang to, burgers to barbeque, candy jars to empty and baseball to break my heart. Oh, and Peloton? That’s right – FUCK YOU!!!