My feet have wavy tan lines on them, about an inch and a half wide and high up near the base of the toes. You may have guessed already and yes, it’s from wearing flip flops. Who among us doesn’t wear them, right? I know, high end of fashion these are, especially when I go all posh and put on the Sanuks (town wear only). For everyday use though, I sport a $10 pair from Old Navy. They show very nicely with my khaki cargo shorts, ratty old Cabelas tee shirt and Dodgers baseball cap. It’s a look, a style and I guess in a very real way, a reflection of where one’s life is, at present.
And life is where right now? Well, my current place of residence is Chillinthefuckoutville! Heard of it? No? It’s very close to where you live, unless it isn’t. Only you would know. I like it here. I haven’t shaved in over two months. My beard is awesome but my wife, well she isn’t a fan. Who knows, in another month I may agree with her and shave it off but for now, I think we’ll keep it. I like to tell myself I look like Sean Connery and try to be as cool as him while taking the dog out for his morning business. I live out of town but there is always a chance of a bear or owl spotting me as I waddle out and shouting, “hey, that dude looks just like James Bond!” No seriously, it could happen. I stay up late, get up early and often take siesta in the afternoon. When I am feeling rebellious, I just might drink coffee after 6 pm even though I know I shouldn’t. I eat Sesame Snacks at 3 in the morning and I never, ever sweat the small stuff anymore (not entirely true as I get extremely agitated when I don’t break 80 in golf and since that is pretty much every time out, I still tend to be angry at the World a fair bit, or at least until I have lunch)!
That lunch sometimes can be Xtra large, which isn’t good because my gut is getting Xtra round. I spend at least a portion of the day listening to Hair Metal and even though my flow is no longer Xtra big, the music as always is Xtra loud because hey, Van Halen is still Xtra AWESOME! I drive an Xtra posh van and we take Xtra long trips on Xtra wide roads. Life is yeah, Xtra fucking AMAZING! And of course, I AM GEN X!
I have not worked a shift of any kind in over 10 weeks, maybe 11 (seriously, who fucking cares anymore, right?). It’s a new time, a new me, a new era, a new epoch – EPOCH X!
Cool eh? For sure it is, of course but…… what exactly is your purpose now? Honestly, I don’t know. I am still figuring it out. The other night while I sat out and watched another Xtra resplendent sunset, I thought about this: how many men my age (who are marvellous and young and sort of fit, thank you) are asking themselves to define their personal style and how they could make that work to everyone’s benefit while pursuing their newfound purpose in life (actually still working on that) so that they can post it on their personal blog? I’ll tell you how many – none!!! Because they are too busy getting on with day to day shit – like WORK! We few extravagant nonconformists (that’s my personal style by the way) who fly outside the lines of normalcy, we are the ones with the time and energy to contemplate such pressing matters of cultural and social significance.
All jokes aside, Lady Hurricane (who is NOT an extravagant non-conformist flying outside the lines of normalcy) and myself are in a very unique position not ordinarily afforded to those our age. We have been gifted a window of time with a near absolute freedom to do and be whatever we want. Say what? Think about that for a moment. Are you getting what I’m throwing down? Oh, and while you are in deep deliberation add in the uncertainty of just how long this open “window of wonderful” stays open before Life the Motherfucker returns.
I know eh? Better start figuring this shit out soon, and I will, I promise! Maybe I can draw inspiration from the Chihuahuan desert of New Mexico, or the Great Plains of Kansas and Nebraska or… the Black Hills of South Dakota? Yeah man, we’re going, to all those places, and I may just live blog it!
EPOCH X is gonna ROCK!!!
2 thoughts on “THE GRUMPY CHRONICLES – Epoch X”
It’s good to live next door to someone unraveling the mysteries of life, quite a refreshing and reflective take. I like colouring outside the lines and others that do as well. Keep up the informative and highly entertaining Chronicles of Marty!
Thank you kindly and heads up, there’s a little black bear between your house and ours!
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