In the winter if I’m not skiing, watching hockey or talking about working out and then not working out, I’m dreaming up trips for the upcoming warmer months. This year we had planned on RV’ing the North Oregon Coast and Washington State’s Olympic Peninsula in May and then circumnavigating Lake Superior in September. But you know, shit happened, shit like threats of annexation / 51st State / Manifest Destiny by a narcissistic, sociopathic, fascist, wannabe dictator. As a proud Canadian I’m not cool with any of that, so it was decided that our vacations this year would be taken North of the border. Except …well … BOSTON!
Here’s the deal: we planned, booked and paid for the entire trip back in December, just before the clown show was getting underway, then watched on with horror as Mango Mussolini and his sycophantic suck ass band of ignorant, infantile idiots ran wild. What are you going to do? We already paid the money, and it was a lot of money, and now it’s too late to cancel without losing big, so yeah … we’re going to BOSTON!
THURSDAY
Calgary / Vancouver / Boston.
We cleared Security twice, once in Calgary and again in Vancouver, and it was also in Vancouver where we cleared U.S. Customs. Yes I read the stories too and believed them to the point where I left my leather-bound writing journal at home and strongly considered doing the same with my MacBook. Okay … not necessary! A middle-aged couple entering the country to watch World Champion Dodgers Baseball hardly qualify as threats to National Security.
This is where we stayed!
Yes, it used to be a jail, like a long time ago, but now it is known as The Liberty Hotel. It’s very ‘bougie’ if I’m being honest, but I’m kind of ‘digging’ it.
Even caught a glimpse of an authentic ‘sugar baby,’ well I’m pretty sure that she was a ‘sugar baby.’ While we were checking in this young blonde cruised through with designer shopping bags while wearing oversized sunglasses and very short shorts that gave everyone a good eyeful of ‘ass.’ It wasn’t even a ‘nice ass,’ and yes I realize that I am being very ‘judgy’ but whatever … if you hang your ass out, people will judge it, just saying.
FRIDAY
Before venturing out this morning I checked the weather app on my phone for an outside temperature; the app said it was 31C. “No way,” I thought, “that has to be wrong because it’s not even 10 am.” Well as we soon discovered, the app was not wrong; it was 31C, a very hot and very sticky 31C, and the day had barely begun.
Quincy Market: basically food venues and shopping stalls. It’s about a 25-minute walk from our hotel. Upon arrival we see that there are already plenty of Dodger fans here milling about, kitted out as always in full team regalia and for the moment anyway, well behaved. I’m hearing that this is a Pantone 294 Takeover Weekend; Pantone 294 is the exact shade which is Dodger Blue and is also the travelling fan group that literally goes everywhere the Dodgers play. They show up in their thousands and can sometimes outnumber the home fans. That’s not going to happen here in Boston, not with Red Sox fans, but yeah, there are a lot of Dodger fans here.
Walking around the Market though is almost too much in this ‘wicked’ heat so we decide to cut our shopping excursion short. But … there are lobster rolls nearby and I’m going to get me one before we head back to the A/C and a cold shower.
And …?
Over-rated, and stupid expensive, but the chowder is out of this world awesome!
But we are not here for the lobster rolls, are we?
This is Fenway Park, first open for business in 1912! This is why we came. Fenway, it’s different from any other stadium that we’ve been to, different than any other sports stadium in North America. Red Sox Baseball is religion in New England and Fenway is their cathedral, old, weathered, full of ghosts, and might I add, perfect! You won’t get a gourmet meal here, its traditional fare, like hot dogs, popcorn and peanuts, washed down with sodas and beer. New ballpark, first time here, gotta eat, right? Absolutely! So, once inside Max hit up the concession stand for a Fenway Dog while I being Italian went for an Italian sausage. God it tasted good too, or at least the two bites I had before it slipped out of the bun and landed on the concrete floor. Yeah … can you believe it? Utter devastation I tell you. Seriously, I so wanted to pick it right back up but there were too many people watching.
The game itself was fun, the Dodgers won. We left after the 8th Inning to better our odds at getting an UBER though we needn’t have worried. Rides were plentiful and within half an hour of leaving The Park we were having ice cream sundaes at JP Licks on Charles St near our hotel.
SATURDAY
For today’s walk I am colour coordinated with my olive Olukai flip flops, plaid shorts, new Boston sports tee shirt trimmed in green, no hat and Hugo Boss aviators. Coffee in the lobby before we set out … if Mart doesn’t have caffeine there will be a headache coming on and I am not really down with that. Outside in the courtyard ladies are going through a yoga class, it’s 10 am and 26C.
Charles Street, maybe my favourite street of any city, but you won’t find the traditional Boston accent here. It’s cosmopolitan, ‘high end,’ and today rather busy. The street feels ‘lived in.’ comfortable, safe. I could live here; except I can’t afford it. We walked up Charles until we met Beacon Street, turned right, and …
Of course! Like seriously, how could you not? When I think of Boston the first three things that pop into my head are the Red Sox, the Bruins, and Cheers. Hands down it’s my favourite sitcom of all time. There’s an actual bar down there too, but it’s not the Cheers bar, that bar was built in a studio in Hollywood. When we were here Max texted Rae and told her we were at Cheers. My stepdaughter’s reply … “what’s Cheers?” Yeah … like Oh. My. God!!! I guess it must be a Gen X thing eh, the show ended 3 years before she was born.
Boston North End, very Italian, like Italians everywhere, a movie set Little Italy except for real, and very loud! There was some sort of Italian American festival going on so tonight it’s mental. Come here if you want to get the full Boston accent. Dinner was at Strego with a friend of Max’s and his wife from high school who now lives down here. Needless to say but I love The North End.
SUNDAY
Rain, lots and lots of rain, but the forecast is for it to go away by game time, or at least that’s what the doorman at The Liberty is telling us. He’s ‘true’ Boston and we have a great hockey talk about the Bruins while waiting for our UBER ride to ‘The Pawk.’
When we get to Fenway it’s still raining and there will be a delay, so we hang down underneath the stands and this guy walks by. He’s wearing one of those old fashioned, white tank top, wife beater, undershirts, butterfly tattoo on the back of his neck and a full face of make-up. Okay, so that was not something I expected to see here, but hey, whatever right?
At 1:35 pm the grounds crew emerged from inside the Green Monster (Fenway’s famous left field wall) to the sounds of ‘I Don’t Care’ pounding out of the sound system, they line up and in unison pull off the tarp covering the infield. The crowd goes crazy. We are going to have baseball, and I am absolutely loving this! It was a decent game too with the Sox edging out LA 4-3, but honestly, being here right now, does it even matter? We left again in the 8th Inning and my last memory of Fenway, and I actually stopped to savour the moment, was of 35 thousand fans belting out ‘Sweet Caroline.’ The old yard shook, wow! We were already comfortably seated at The Boston Burger Company (a Guy Fieri joint and wicked good too) when the actual game ended.
In the evening we ate more ice cream (not healthy but oh so good) and took a last walk along Charles Street (healthy and almost as good). Charles Street’s lamps are still gas lit and so emit a softer glow, making Charles St even more charming at night than it is during the day.
MONDAY
Our flight home is not until 6:30 tonight so we got a late check out then left our bags with the hotel before heading out for one last walk about. We headed back to the North End. It’s bloody hot, almost too hot to walk, so the A/C inside the Boston Market is very welcome. Lunch was at Beantown Pastrami. I had a pastrami and corned beef on rye with mustard, pickled cabbage, pickles and Swiss cheese. “Pink Pony Club” was playing on the loudspeaker and I couldn’t help but think of the Stanley Cup Champion Florida Panthers (it was their song, and they beat those loser Oilers – sorry couldn’t help it).
Our last stop in the North End was to a little tee shirt shop. The old boy behind the counter barely bothered to look up as we entered. He seemed a bit cranky but perked up when a woman walked in behind us and handed him a brown paper bag. It was filled with cash, stacks and stacks of cash. Okay, that’s interesting, then we walk out and there she is again with another brown paper bag going into a different little shit box of a shop. Now I’m not going all ‘Godfather’ or anything, but we are in Little Italy.
Back to The Liberty to grab our bags and there’s our doorman again, yup more hockey talk, to the point where the UBER driver that had come to pick us up for the airport had to wait while we continued with the discussion on how the Bruins will do this coming season.
FINAL THOUGHTS
In a trip such as this time seems to move way too fast, you get to where you are going and next thing you know you are on the return flight home. Rarely are you able to see everything you had planned on seeing some of what you see just doesn’t fit into a written piece such as this, and that’s okay. We caught enough of this city to say definitively that Boston is amazing and definitely worth the time and expense that is required to get there. Seriously, I’m missing the seafood chowder already.
Happy travels to you all!